Rough Drift

"Small" writing challenges for my small writing talent. Hotel note pads are the only space allowed. Let's see if I can strip it down and tighten it up to learn something. Improving my skill of weird fiction.

13.) Accident No.4

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A foreman stepped up, “Here’s the worker files you asked for.”

An inspector’s hand lifted the caution tape. Past the tape, a two-story house had fallen to shambles, looking like it was kicked over by an angry gigantic three-year-old. Natural wood framing leaned against foundations. Pallets of plywood and concrete bags sat on the red dirt around the perimeter. Everything appeared like a standard construction site except for three sheets covering three bodies among scattered lumber. The stack of files were of the twelve men working that morning.

“Not pretty,” began the inspector, “So, tell me what you know of the accident okay? What you heard, saw…”

The foreman swallowed looking down, “Well, I had three men up on top, following safety protocol, you know. They were moving the roof truss by that crane you see on it’s side. Two men worked the corners of the truss into position and a third pulled on a rope to adjust it. I heard a scream, two more screams and before I could see anything happen, it was all over.”

The other nine men confirmed the story. Two of them saw a rope holder let go, swinging the truss back into the crane, knocking two men off the high structure and tipping over the crane, destroying some other trusses on the ground.

“Show me the man on the rope.”

The foreman walked the inspector to the white sheet closest to the foundation. The inspector knelt down and rolled back the sheet, exposing a man appearing beat up and missing his right arm at the elbow. Javier was his name. The file showed a father of three. Nothing unusual. Occasional medical admissions for the usual construction injuries-fingers, toes. The limb replacement was normal but this one was troubling. It was textbook. Everything was certified and yet, just like the others using a KDLcorp industrial arm, socket failure. The tattoo serial number matched the inspector’s list.

“Call you’re insurance company. I’ve seen four failures of this exact replacement limb in three months. There’s an un-known bad batch out there. Looks like Javier had one”

Javier was the fourth. The inspector’s quick math told him thirty-seven arms remained from that batch. Nobody knows where they are.

(Author’s notes) September 4th, 2015: Home (360 words)

This was a thought about future concerns. As advancements become commonplace instead of news stories, problems will come up, just like in the auto and aviation business. Bogus parts are hart to track and the results are crashes and injury or death. I put that concept into regular daily use.

The rough draft part worked out well but after editing and correcting for readability it got a bit larger that I wanted. It was also harder to limit myself on this one. Where to cut it short, where to cut and remove. Editing. I’m sure there’s more to do here to make it really strong but the story itself is nice I think. If you have suggestions in where My writing is weak as far as structure and usage issues with parts of speech or anything, let me know in the comments please. I’m here to get better.

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2 comments on “13.) Accident No.4

  1. Pingback: 46.) Accident Zero is Matt’s Fault. | Rough Drift

  2. Pingback: Hiatus has arrived; expect blog delays. | Rough Drift

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This entry was posted on September 4, 2015 by in fiction, near-future, sci-fi and tagged , , , .
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